托福考试写作例文16
发布时间：2013/7/26 23:25:46 来源：城市网学院 编辑：admin
The lecturer provide the opposite opinion concerning what the article offered. The team work often bring negative effect. As we all know superficially, team work and team spirits are quite popular in today's business world and also the fashionable terms.
However, the lecturer find deeper and hiding results.
Firstly, the working results of team members can't be fully valued. For example, if a team member does nothing in the process of team discussion, decision making -and final pratice, his or her work deliquency will not be recognized because we only emphasize team work. Also, the real excellent and creative member's work might be obliterated for the same reason. Secondly, the team work might lose its value when team members are leading by several influential people in the group. One to the essential merits of team is to avoid the individule wrong. But one or two influential or persuasive people will make the team useless.
Thirdly, team work often be#e the excuse of taking responsibility. All in charge, nobody care.
All in all, what we should do is the fully distinguish the advantages and disadvantages of a concept or widely used method. That is to keep the #mon sense.
Rater's Comments
This response frames the issue well. The first point is clearly stated and accurately conveys the lecturer's #ments about team members who contribute very little and team members who contribute a great deal. However, the writer discusses the second point about influencers in somewhat error-prone or vague and non-idiomatic language ("hiding results" "working results" and "when team members are leading by... influential people"). The point about influencers drops off at making the team "useless" and does not fully explain the reason these influencers create problems. The final point beginning with the word "thirdly" is not fully related to the pas- sage and lecture, and the meaning of it is unclear. This response illustrates many of the typical features that can cause a response to receive the score of 3.
